Mangalore2015
I am thinking , over the years...did my parents ever told me, "I love you"? Did they ever said You are wonderful, awesome, and you are the best, or I am proud of you? The cuddling, hugging, blessings on the head or kisses on forehead or cheeks.( I know these are very filmy those days).did that ever happen? OK, from my side, did I ever told," my daddy the strongest"? or did I feel my mommy the most loving ? I as a parent now, keeping all this in mind, I do my best with my kids... play, cheer, hug, cry, laugh with them. I want to be not what my parents were, right? I want to give them what I did not get, correct? Though I never measured my parents love, did I not respect them enough? I know, my parents were handling family duties, that too huge ones those days, the way they know of. With their limited knowledge of what they thought was right parenting formula they used on us. so if they were upset with us, angry at our acts, not happy.., no actually.. indifferent, ( that is the correct word) with our successes and achievements! They showed their displeasure for good/bad or no reason, and still could get away with it, as we kids were obedient enough for their luck. We kids use to take it in our stride, with out showing our upsets. If we show also who cares?, was our thought!!! In fact it never occurred to us that we can back answer our parents, or play blame games with them, or disrespect them, hurt them with any words or actions. They definitely were loving caring in their own way, working very hard to make us successful, respectful people in the society. I truly feel they have done their best with their limitations and means, and knowledge. I am not saying we suffered big time or miserable at any point as kids, but we had some more expectations from them, which are normal for kids to have . In spite of all this parent child understanding issues, we never failed to respect them, obey them! we may not did all that out of love or they being elders,parents. But it was may be simple child Psychology I guess . Respect out of fear, mixture of love n hate, helplessness and dependency. !That some how worked that time, and my parents though not any winners of best parents award or any such compliments from their kids, they did their best and fullest. Life was kind and God being great, his grace /blessings were definitely on them/ us from then to now. So we all siblings have taken "the kids of our parents" part very seriously and till today we not only take care of them, respect them, and try never to hurt them. Even today we all, some with even their highest qualifications, and all with different professions , patiently keep saying Yes papa, OK amma to their advice's , cynical questions or innocent requests !!Its not that they are always right or we kids were wrong, or vice versa, nor they have done any PHD in parenting. But we all were the so called Sandwiched generation..last of its kind, where we listened,obeyed our parents and listen,obey our kids now.
I am thinking , over the years...did my parents ever told me, "I love you"? Did they ever said You are wonderful, awesome, and you are the best, or I am proud of you? The cuddling, hugging, blessings on the head or kisses on forehead or cheeks.( I know these are very filmy those days).did that ever happen? OK, from my side, did I ever told," my daddy the strongest"? or did I feel my mommy the most loving ? I as a parent now, keeping all this in mind, I do my best with my kids... play, cheer, hug, cry, laugh with them. I want to be not what my parents were, right? I want to give them what I did not get, correct? Though I never measured my parents love, did I not respect them enough? I know, my parents were handling family duties, that too huge ones those days, the way they know of. With their limited knowledge of what they thought was right parenting formula they used on us. so if they were upset with us, angry at our acts, not happy.., no actually.. indifferent, ( that is the correct word) with our successes and achievements! They showed their displeasure for good/bad or no reason, and still could get away with it, as we kids were obedient enough for their luck. We kids use to take it in our stride, with out showing our upsets. If we show also who cares?, was our thought!!! In fact it never occurred to us that we can back answer our parents, or play blame games with them, or disrespect them, hurt them with any words or actions. They definitely were loving caring in their own way, working very hard to make us successful, respectful people in the society. I truly feel they have done their best with their limitations and means, and knowledge. I am not saying we suffered big time or miserable at any point as kids, but we had some more expectations from them, which are normal for kids to have . In spite of all this parent child understanding issues, we never failed to respect them, obey them! we may not did all that out of love or they being elders,parents. But it was may be simple child Psychology I guess . Respect out of fear, mixture of love n hate, helplessness and dependency. !That some how worked that time, and my parents though not any winners of best parents award or any such compliments from their kids, they did their best and fullest. Life was kind and God being great, his grace /blessings were definitely on them/ us from then to now. So we all siblings have taken "the kids of our parents" part very seriously and till today we not only take care of them, respect them, and try never to hurt them. Even today we all, some with even their highest qualifications, and all with different professions , patiently keep saying Yes papa, OK amma to their advice's , cynical questions or innocent requests !!Its not that they are always right or we kids were wrong, or vice versa, nor they have done any PHD in parenting. But we all were the so called Sandwiched generation..last of its kind, where we listened,obeyed our parents and listen,obey our kids now.
I am sure this is the story of every child born in the 50's to 70's
and now between the ages of 40 and 60!! WE are simultaneously providing some
financial assistance to both our kids and our parents. The obligations placed
on the sandwich generation demand considerable time and money. With the added
pressures of managing one's own career and personal issues, as well as the need
to contribute to one's own retirement, the individuals of the sandwich
generation definitely are under significant stress!
The generation of middle-aged individuals who are pressured
to support both aging parents and growing children. The sandwich generation is
named so because they are effectively "sandwiched" between the
obligation to care for their aging parents - who may be ill, unable to perform
various tasks or in need of financial support - and children, who require
financial, physical and emotional support. How ever much we do we still get the
not enough look from our kids, and at the same time our hearts melt at the sight
of our aging parents, and we want to do as much as we can for them! Balancing
acts, with parents, and coping up the blame games of our kids, we the
sandwich generation is always positive, still hopeful and looks for the approval..of
who else, both our parents as well as of our kids! Finally...., lastly, positively,happily the bottom line of all this and like icing on the cake... what I love most is...this!!
It is not exactly my original, but something beautiful which I would like to say..,
Anyone who was born in the 50,60,70,...
we are the last generation who played in the streets.
we are the first who played the video games. The last to record songs off the radio to the cassette tape. We walked over a mile with out worries on being taken...We learned how to program the VCR before any one else. We played from Monopoly , Ludo to scrabble n pack man! We are the generation from lady bird,famous five, Nancy drew to Tom and Jerry and Archie's!!We traveled in cycle rickshaws as well as Bajaj scooters. WE watched Matinee movies in loud theaters. If in cars, then with out seat belts or air bags.WE lived with no cell phones, or lap tops. WE did not have flat screens, surround sound, I pods, face book, twitter or for that matter inter nets or Wi fis. But nevertheless we had a great time. This post of mine is dedicated to the 50's, 60's,or the 70's babies.
It is not exactly my original, but something beautiful which I would like to say..,
Anyone who was born in the 50,60,70,...
we are the last generation who played in the streets.
we are the first who played the video games. The last to record songs off the radio to the cassette tape. We walked over a mile with out worries on being taken...We learned how to program the VCR before any one else. We played from Monopoly , Ludo to scrabble n pack man! We are the generation from lady bird,famous five, Nancy drew to Tom and Jerry and Archie's!!We traveled in cycle rickshaws as well as Bajaj scooters. WE watched Matinee movies in loud theaters. If in cars, then with out seat belts or air bags.WE lived with no cell phones, or lap tops. WE did not have flat screens, surround sound, I pods, face book, twitter or for that matter inter nets or Wi fis. But nevertheless we had a great time. This post of mine is dedicated to the 50's, 60's,or the 70's babies.
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