Give time, time....

When I reflect upon what I’ve learnt about loss, grief, and life in the past few years, for sure, I know ...Give time ,time ! I didn't believe this advice though!

When someone leaves, or we lose something, all that’s gone is  the  physical form. That notion is tremendously comforting, is not it??.

 Visiting a family with their recent loss made me think more about it.This visit gave me a kind of courage and strength which I thought either I dont have it in me, or I have lost it, even if I had it. So this is in a way my new gained confidence.., of handling life if and when I need to bear with any personal  loss or need to support some one with the same. These thoughts flew and I wanted to make a note of it...!Life is busy, yes. But making time for the people who matter to us/me.. Spending time with  everyone who's important, is a must from now on!. I want to use this detached technology ( as I call it)..for this purpose. I use it, even during my normal days. I keep away from all gadgets and technology when I am with real people, my parents, friends, siblings... !

 I have decided to ask them questions..like, What did they think about the world when they were my age? What were they doing? What year were they the happiest? What are their favorite memories of me?  Then I  would Write it down,like this! I am sure I will revisit these stories, many times as  memories!

How are you today, is all that the question I need to ask myself/the concerned people than how are you? Since may be looks can be deceiving? They /me may look OK, but may not be OK?  Emotions are  like a  roller coaster—they can go from laughter to tears in seconds. There is no right or wrong way, and I should never judge anyone who is experiencing or going through these emotions..happy or sad!. The process is deeply personal.No one wants sympathy or questions.  If this is my/our way of handling things, then that’s OK.

 At this point, my life is already more than halfway through. This sounds scary, but to me, it’s motivating. Death gives life meaning. When I contemplate my own imminent death one day, I feel courageous, fearless, and powerful.  we all are  allowed to feel this way too. The hardest lessons bring the greatest freedoms.

I/we, think of my/our loss every day—especially when something good or funny happens. Or every time we achieve a significant milestone. I  am sure one feels envious when they see other people getting the best of what we/I did not get! And that’s OK too. AS long as we are able to practice compassion for our own emotions, which we must consider the highest form of self care.

 The way I handle grief or  loss  has changed shape over the years! But now I feel it’s true and its only time.  If  we give time, time  our  physical pangs of suffering become fewer . and we can live a life of pride, keeping the loss as a part of life!   And the  moments of questioning, can be the the moments of  healing.

I dedicate this post to Beck  for educating me with this wisdom ...!