Monkey Mind

Nov 2014 

 I was sitting holding my stomach n my amma was telling me you have to take care of your health! I don't know when any one told me like that last. Or for that matter I don't have many times in my life where my mom sat next to me worrying of my health!My mind was not in the present at that point of time, enjoying the me and my mom moment but in fear for my future..God why do I get this stomach pains, was what I was thinking. suddenly  I got the feeling that I was watching a rehearsal,  no actually a play in front of me!! And with out me knowing I had a major role in it! How can that happen?Mind game?? Minutes,.. no with in seconds everything changed, and some relationships went for a toss,  and I could see people around me in pain, anger, frustration etc etc and the play was going on and on and  My role being major!!!...hmmm was I asked if I wanted to play that role? I was narrating the whole incident and the person listening to it, immediately said you played a role you did not wanted to, and what did you lose? some relationships, some bonds, and some hurts ..! But remember  people losing their lives at no mistake of theirs, like the Boston marathon where people standing on the side of the roads? Some lost their lives, and some lost limbs, and what not, which is irreparable or replaceable by any one.What was their mistake? nothing. They were there to cheer the runners! But some lost their lives and many lost their loved ones. So many times we here bomb blasts killing innocent people, air crashes and of course natural calamities making major changes in peoples lives. Does any one ask them? No rite..! It has to happen so it happens! Who decides this? Our past I guess. What ever left over dues from past life you are paying in this life, is what my mind tells me.

 Since its not planned, our mind is not playing these games. Can mind play games I wonder!!More than mindless games I believe in  Mindfulness!! Mindfulness entails trusting the present moment to be as precious as any other and valuing where we are, and whatever we are engaged with in the moment, over anywhere else that our mind makes us feel we could or rather be. Practicing mindfulness stills the mind, deepens our clarity, and calms our anxieties – thereby enhancing confidence and reducing the number of our thoughts. If this is not so, wont our mind will be like a monkeys? Our mind on average, has over 50,000 thoughts in a day i read some where. Thoughts of all types what ever task we are doing, and which ever targets we are achieving. Our thoughts forever racing ahead with numerous other thoughts – of potential rewards, missed opportunities, future actions and so on...

 This mental chatter is no passing cloud, but a permanent ‘noise’ in the background. These are our life  experiences, particularly during the impressionable childhood years, the monkey mind is a result of our deep inner insecurity about our physical life form and a constant endeavor to somehow control our destiny.

While some of this noise goads us towards personal and social development, much of it is dysfunctional. It restricts us from fully enjoying the present, resulting in lower effectiveness and a diluted sense of fulfillment. The negative undertones of many of our thoughts generate heightened emotions of fear , anxiety, anger or envy, making us restless, confused and impulsive. So again the thoughts take us back to our mind, and mind what else but like a monkey mind!!